It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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