just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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