We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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