gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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