i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
