What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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