community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
They have beer where we have blood.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize