They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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