believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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