how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
