Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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