Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize