you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
