Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
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A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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