You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
