sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
