even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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