How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
