I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
