As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
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All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
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She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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