To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
