Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
You should frame my arrest warrant.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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