it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
