so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
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He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize