It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
