I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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