I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
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So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
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I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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