If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.