My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
