so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize