Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling

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(631): View more from New York

And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.

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(954): View more from Florida

He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(404): View more from Georgia

Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Where was your thought process?

(1-778): View more from British Columbia

Drowning in my hangover.

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(905): View more from Ontario

I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.

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(646): View more from New York

ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry

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(252): View more from North Carolina

Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.

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