xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I just googled if crying burns calories
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
