Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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