i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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