Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
