Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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