Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
