Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
