LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
