you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
