somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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