A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Four minutes until I can fart!
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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