if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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