I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
