is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
