This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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