If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Randomize