You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
