Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
