I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
