Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
